Almost like ole’ times…almost

I am happy to report that with half the dose of pre-drugs from my last treatment, it wasn’t all that bad. Of course, I would rather not go to the closet since it is still disgusting. After all these visits to the closet, I had a new nurse who had the idea of slowing the drip down for me so I could actually focus and avoid the wave of nausea because as she said, “you are a small person.” Guess no one ever bothered to look at me and thought the faster the better, so I can have the most side effects possible. I guess I need to have 13 more visits to get this whole routine perfect. This nurse also made me laugh as she gave me a very convincing look that the closet will undergo extreme makeover by 2030. My cousin, Margie and I were equally as entertained by the office worker who was extremely focused on putting the rolling stools away, and I guess she did not notice the darkness, stink, and ugly broken chairs. Hmmmm….glad she was focused on making sure those stools were placed perfectly among the rolling drawers of iv equipment. We also found the doctor’s comment about losing his car based on his bets on our cancers pretty funny too. I think we should collect on this bet as Margie needs a new car and we could use a vacation home!

Back to my normalcy, I did manage a walk or two this week and going to the gym almost like my old self. Of course, when I have my wig squeezing my brain while sweating, I am reminded of my situation. I am also reminded of my routine of taking pills or not taking pills or getting refills or organizing the pills or making my list for the next doctor visit. I am tired of it and have to say that I am not loving this routine. I am especially loving it less when a friend reminds me of how her life is overwhelming only to realize that I would trade her overwhelming moments for mine in a second (Note:  You are all entitled to be overwhelmed with the baking, cooking, cleaning, setting the table,and  the timing of the meal for Thanksgiving).  It is usually when I catch my breath or feel like I almost like my old self that I get a little “tap” on the shoulder. A call to remind me of a  doctor visit just around the corner (yes, Monday-don’t these doctors celebrate Thanksgiving?!) or a medical bill arrives from service that was back in April and I am forced to pull all those papers out again and re-read all that foreign language again. And yes, I am still puzzled by my hair re-growth. I cannot help it. I am happy to report that my eyebrows are coming in despite the perpendicularity of the hairs. It is official, I now have old man eyebrows except they are dark brown.  My hair on my head has become entertaining as I pat down the stray hairs or think I can comb them with a baby doll brush (too bad I threw Alex’s baby brush away). I definitely have given into the fact that this wig is my new friend even if it squeezes my brain. I am thinking at this rate, my hair will not be even a short hair cut until one year. So, I can now focus on the random hair growth over my body which I will need one of those full length magnifying mirrors. Do they even come in full body length?

I am tired, but very thankful. Thankful that this all seems to be working and thankful for the wonderful support of family and friends especially those who keep me smiling and laughing. The rest of you, you know who you are and I will come after you…after Thanksgiving! I know these days are busy for everyone, but slow down and give a friend a hug or really listen to your kids or your family and enjoy every minute (give or take some seconds).


One Response to “Almost like ole’ times…almost”

  1. amy Says:

    Love you Joanie! OX Amy

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